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Older women want sex more, not less. &quot,No matter how you look, from when you&#x27,re young to now that you&#x27,re very old, you&#x27,re exactly the same person. All those impulses and desires, for physical touch, for sex, for companionship, they&#x27,re all the same.&quot, At 75 Sarah * seldom sees women her age held up by the wider world as attractive, let alone sexually desirable, but desire, she says, doesn&#x27,t fade with age.

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Research shows many women in their 60s, 70s and 80s have more time for sex than ever before. Credit: Getty images. &quot,It&#x27,s not this high-octane compulsion that it used to be, but it&#x27,s not that it&#x27,s not there. Maybe it&#x27,s morphed into something a bit more subtle.&quot, Twice divorced and with her current partner for three years, Sarah says that while it&#x27,s largely accepted that men will continue to have sexual feelings as they age, the same isn&#x27,t true for older women. She sees the myth about women losing their sexuality over the years as part of the invisibility that older women so often suffer. &quot,It&#x27,s very wrong, along with a lot of the assumptions about older women.&quot, Sarah says that while a lot of older women don&#x27,t like their bodies, and may struggle to see themselves as attractive, life in the retirement years, including your sex life, can be a time of great freedom. New insight into a typically taboo subject has found that many women in their 60s, 70s and 80s have more, not less, sexual desire, know more about what they want in bed and are more confident about letting their partners know. Free from the exhaustion and constant interruptions of early family life, and past the looming fear of unwanted pregnancies, many women are newly enthusiastic about their sexual desires and have a far broader idea of what a happy and satisfying sex life might involve. As the women who led the sexual revolution of the 1960s and 70s hit older age, it seems many of them are once again tearing up social conventions and redefining what sexual desire means to them. Researchers on a joint Victorian and New South Wales study, Sex, Desire and Pleasure: Considering the Experiences of Older Australian Women, say their findings have debunked many of the myths surrounding sex for older women. Dr Bianca Fileborn, of La Trobe University’s Australian Research Centre in Sex, Health and Society, says far from women&#x27,s level of sexual desire gradually fading away over time, many women&#x27,s appetite for sex and intimacy increases in later years and that this is driven by factors other than ageing. &quot,Some women did experience that kind of gradual decline, particularly as they went through menopause, [but] for other women they experienced a great increase in sexual desire. For a lot of women their sexual desire was quite fluid across their lives. &quot,A lot of women have periods in their lives, for example when they had young children, when they weren&#x27,t all that interested in sex, presumably because they were exhausted. So it wasn&#x27,t that linear decline, it&#x27,s something that ebbs and flows across the life span,&quot, she says. One of the women interviewed for the research, aged 57, described this stage as the best time in her life, sexually. &quot,The women I&#x27,ve known, like in this stage of my life, are not frightened of sex. I reckon it&#x27,s probably the best time in your life actually because you&#x27,re not going to have kids, you don&#x27,t have to think about a house.&quot, Researchers also found that many older women have a diverse idea of what makes up satisfying sexual activity and were keen for their partners to broaden their repertoire. &quot,There is this wide spread assumption that older people and particularly older women are asexual, and one of the really striking things about our research is that it does show that older women do continue to engage in a wide variety of sexual practices and that sex is still a really important source of pleasure and intimacy for them,&quot, Dr Fileborn says. Faced with health issues and diminished agility, many older women interviewed for the study talked about a desire to engage in sexual activities other than penetration. Researchers say health practitioners and others should be discussing alternative forms of pleasure for older women. &quot,This could include, for example, considering open or casual sexual relationships, the use of sex toys and aids, the use of pornography which is specifically designed to meet the needs and demands of older women, or the use of commercial sex workers&quot,. Research fellow Rachel Thorpe, also from La Trobe University, says a discussion about sex not being limited to penetration is something that should be encouraged throughout life, rather than waiting until both men and women were older and facing health challenges. One woman interviewed for the study complained that after her husband had undergone prostate surgery and could not maintain an erection, he refused to engage in any sexual activity, or to talk about other options. But Thorpe said many older women were confident about discussing their sexual desires and talking to their partners about trying new things and broadening their sexual repertoire. Another key finding from the study is that older women often have contradictory feelings about their own desirability. While many women interviewed feel that their bodies aren&#x27,t attractive any more, and don&#x27,t not see images of women like themselves held up as desirable by society, when they are engaged in sexual activity with a partner they feel desirable.

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